Easy Time Gone

Someday, I'll think of the words that I should say
Long before I realize it's too late
To say them.


Last night, I had a dream everything was fine.
It's been a long time since I've been alright.
I can't take it.


Honestly, I'm faking.
Don't know what to do when my heart isn't breaking.


And I don't know how long I can keep this up,
Making these feelings up.
I don't know what to say anymore.
I don't care anymore,
And I'm giving up.
I'm not crying, because I'm all alone.
I'm not dying, because I wasn't the one.
I'm not looking for anyone.
It's been a long time coming but an easy time gone.


Nightfall, hopeful there will be no pain.
But disappointment knows me by my first name.
And I can't escape.


But daybreak, the makeup is off my face.
As for heartbreak, I think I've simmered the ache.
I can breathe again.


Honestly, I'm broken.
The web of lies I tell myself is woven.


And I don't know how long I can keep this up,
Making these feelings up.
I don't know what to say anymore.
I don't care anymore,
And I'm giving up.
I'm not crying, because I'm all alone.
I'm not dying, because I wasn't the one.
I'm not looking for anyone.
It's been a long time coming but an easy time gone.


 And I don't know why I ever let you get to me.
I let you take the best of me.
But now I know that my heart is stone.
I can't let it go, so I'll let it show.


 Call me wrong and call me crazy.
But I will never call you Baby.
 If you come around, you won't break me down.
 Maybe a year or two, someone could save me.


But this is how I feel right now.


And I don't know how long I can keep this up,
Making these feelings up.
And I don't what to say anymore.
I don't feel anything anymore. 


(September 2011)